Obituary

“Mervin led a happy life. He held a high regard to duty, but would rather play above anything else. Commonly coined as 'lazy', but when it came time to put in the work, he would finish his tasks to his full ability, at least when it really mattered to him. God blessed him with talents in the areas of academics, music, and athletics. After high school, he was determined to become a dentist, and in 2017 graduated from the Loma Linda University School of Dentistry. He was an avid member of the band, chorale, and jazz band during his high school years, and continued his love for music by performing for churches and other small functions. While in high school, Mervin played volleyball and basketball, and competed competitively in Tae Kwon Do. As a dentist, Mervin traveled the world as a missionary, using his skills in whatever corners of the world he could touch. He is an individual who will truly be missed.”
When I talked to my parents about their retirement plans and how they want to be cared for, they told me that they would try to live on their own for as long as possible, then when they can no longer take care of themselves, they were hoping that they could live with me. This is the arrangement I prefer because I do not trust other people enough to care for my parents. I am fully confident that I could do a job just as good or better than any nursing home could ever provide. I just hope that my parents will get a long with my spouse and do not try to run our lives. That was my only request to my mom and dad when they asked if they could live with me in the future. Besides, I have heard terrible stories of people in nursing homes getting beaten and being mistreated, and my parents have been too good to me to deserve that. My parents are actually in the middle of planning their funerals. They have already got their locations in the graveyard figured out, but they still have not picked out their coffins. Both of them are planning for burial because I told them that I did not want them to get cremated. I could not stand the idea of keeping my parents remains in a little jar. My dad just got the software to plan out his will, but that is in progress and has not been finalized yet, and it probably will not be for a while.

MBTI Couple Profile

As an ENTP, I offer many strengths in the areas of being able to get along with a wide variety of people. Typically, I am an enthusiastic, upbeat, and popular person, who is also very charming. What helps my social adeptness are my excellent skills in the area of communication. I driven at working to improve myself and my relationships with other people, which I take very seriously. I am not so attached that my life stops if my relationships with other people stop, however. I am fully dependent and can get along perfectly fine by myself. People also like me because I am laid back and flexible to new things. We also always have a big plan on our mind as well that we are constantly striving towards. Making money is usually not an issue, but the problem is being able to manage it. Despite these strengths, ENTPs have their fair share of weaknesses as well. I am always excited by new things, so I'm prone to changing partners frequently. Despite any big plans, I tend not to follow them. I love to provoke arguments.
The main strength of this relationship is that the ESFJ will boost the confidence of the ENTP because ENTPs tend to be very hypercritical of themselves. In the event of this, the ESFJ is there to comfort and reassure. The problems associated with this relationship are more associated with commitment. Because ESFJs are so commited, the ENTP may be commited as well, so long as their attention span permits. After that, attention will decrease and the ESFJ will feel neglected. Also, ESFJs are habitual with their love habits, clashing with the spontaneous nature of the ENTP.
When I asked my parents what was the best part about being married was raising kids together. When they see my sister and develop, they see the parts of themselves that they injected to us grow and develop, and they feel that it's just kind of neat to see. The worst part for them was the grown up aspect of marriage, like managing finances and having to learn to get a long with each other at the beginning of their marriage.

Ideal Spouse

My list for required things that a spouse must absolutely have is not very long. First of all, she must absolutely be SDA. After my reacquaintance with God, and having a relationship that integrated Him, I'm never going back. If I dated a girl, and she converted, I would not mind that either. Second, she has to understand how to act around other people. A lack of common sense is a massive turn off to me, and I could not tolerate someone who makes a fool of themselves in front of other people all the time. Thirdly, she has to respect me. I would not be comfortable enough to marry a girl who is putting me down all the time. I don't mind criticism, she just has to be mindful how she present it to me. Four, we have to have absolutely amazing communication. Terrible communication would bother me, because if there was some sort of problem, it would not get solved quickly.
My wish list is pretty long, and hoping to fulfill this whole wish is highly unlikely, but a guy can dream. First, I would like her to be athletic. Athleticism means we can do sports together and also that she's got a pretty nice figure. I don't mind a tiny belly, but there's a point where anymore is just not attractive. Second, I would like her to be musical. Music is a huge part of my life, and if we could make music together, all the better. I love communicating with songs and if she can do that too, even better. Third, I want her to be smart. One of my favorite things to do is have long, insightful conversations with me about things ranging from technology, current events, spiritual things, etc. This requires that a person has gained a broad amount of knowledge from multiple sources. Fourth, I want her to drive a motorcycle. There just this certain appeal about a girl who rides a motorcycle, and it's just hot. Fifth, dancing would be really good. I just recently found out how fun dancing is, mostly because I was told I really wasn't that bad, so if she can dance, we could dance together, and I find that very fun.
For my non-negotiables, I don't feel that my list is very long. One, she can't be another religion. I am not about to have a spiritually divided house because there would also be conflict when raising the kids. Two, she can't be taller than me. I know it's a superficial thing, but I would be really uncomfortable walking out in public and my wife is taller than me. Third, if she has kids from a past marriage. I know it might sound mean, and I like to think that I wouldn't act this way, but, if we had our own kids, I may end up treating my kids better. Rather than put myself in a situation to feel guilty, I'll just avoid it completely.
When I asked my parents what I should look for, they and I had very similar things to say. One thing that I didn't mention, but they reminded me of, is that she should be a hard working. Knowing me I work pretty hard at whatever I do, so it would irritate me if she was the lazy type.

Love Song Analysis

Ocean Wide

Look outside
It's already light and the stars ran away with the night
Things we're said, words that we'll try forget,
it's so hard to admit I know we've made mistakes
I see through all the tears but that's what got us here

[Chorus:]
If love is an ocean wide
We'll swim in the tears we cry
They'll see us through to the other side
We're gonna make it
When love is a raging sea
You can hold on to me
We'll find a way tonight
Love is an ocean wide

I'll stay right here
It's where I'll always belong
Tied with your arms
Days like this, I wish the sun wouldn't set
I don't want to forget
What made us feel this way
You see through all my fears
And that's what got us here

[Chorus]

Love is an ocean wide enough to forget
Even when we think we can't

In “Ocean Wide”, the types of expressed are most friendship and commitment. I think this would be God's ideal for me at the moment because the passion part of complete love should really be saved for marriage. Besides, in real love, passion should never take priority over friendship or commitment because it makes sex a selfish thing. Something that makes me uncomfortable is the first verse. To me it shows that there was an argument because he's talking about words that they regret and mistakes that they'd made, but what I do like about it is that it's realistic. No relationship comes without some kinds of arguments, and if there is never arguing, something isn't right.

This song helped me realize God's ideal for human love is one where both people are able to work together and overcomes struggles rather than run away from them. I wouldn't really say that this song has much to say about family life. It's really directed more towards a couple only. The words in this song a totally rational in nature. “Things we're said, words that we'll try forget, it's so hard to admit I know we've made mistakes” doesn't paint this picture of happy forever and ever, but rather it acknowledges that times are going to hard sometimes. But, despite these are hard times, the two people will hold on to each other to keep each other strong to make it through their struggles.

Yes, the message gives the message that I'm a valuable person capable of making rational choices. It shows that the person has a choice whether not to stay in the relationship, and in the song, the person chooses to tough it out and work things out. This is a very clean song and the only sexual implication I could think of would be at the beginning. “ Look outside, It's already light and the stars ran away with the night” could possibly be that the two people have spent the night with each other. If I were the object of this person's love, I would feel very lucky because the love that I hope to have is one where we both enjoy each other's company, but we both understand that we're not going to agree on everything and that we need to work things out. “ I'll stay right here, It's where I'll always belong, Tied with your arms” to me is that the person chooses to be with me, and is in the relationship for the long-run.

I don't feel that the song I chose was typical of the songs that my friends are listening to, because the song that they listen to are full of wishful thinking. The music definitely adds to the meaning of the words. At the beginning, it starts off quiet, like that calm after the resolve of an argument, then the songs builds off the idea that things are getting better, and as such, the music becomes more upbeat. Now that I have carefully analyzed the message of this song, I wish to find a love that will function somewhat like the love in this song, in respect to the idea that they people work things out.